I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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