covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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