Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
