Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
