When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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