Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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