You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
My feet surprised me
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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