the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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