the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
