I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
