I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
