Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
