wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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