i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
