walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
it's great music for shaving your balls
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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