He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
