I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
