she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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