You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Randomize
