Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
