If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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