I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
