Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
