Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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