If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Randomize
