you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
