waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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