so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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