About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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