I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
