Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
he had hair everywhere except his balls
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Randomize