1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
