She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
