put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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