she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize