Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
