So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize