Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
