That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
