So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
