I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize