If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
