My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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