Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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