Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize