he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
