Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
