"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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