but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
