We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
