I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize