You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
